I feel like shit today. fucking shit. But I've been a lot worse.
This economy is soooo bad for my mental health it isn't true.
I'm epically pissed off because my bank yer, last year was willing to lend about £97k and now it's gone down to about £56k. So basically I'm being punished for being born in 1985 instead of 1984. Thanks economy you're so fair to people. The worst thing isn't how inaccessible things are cos they cost too much its how you have to wait sooo long for life things to happen like get a house which is pretty fundamental to your existence. I should of been in my own apartment in a full time job as soon as I left Uni age 22. But no, I'm 29 and am still waiting.
People need to understand that not everyone is competitive, not everyone has a kill or be killed mentality, and some of us are very passive and submissive. Doesn't mean I want to be controlled it just means when it comes to relationships I like to do things for other people cooperatively, but work in my own space. Let's say I have a feminine nature. Can I show it, no of course not cos that would make sense and make everything ok and life only knows how to treat me like fucking shit.
On top of that I can't do anything I actually want to do unless I'm in the right mood for it, and I'm never in the right mood
I have no self esteem, no social skills, nothing to show, no "real" friends, yet I know I'm a really good person. Life is just an absolute piece of shit and punishes nice people especially if you are born with a penis.
I wish so hard I could live in a world where I can be a delicate person because I am very delicate and vulnerable. This is the way I am
No comments:
Post a Comment